Gallery Opening Terror, Part 1

I am being most shaken and upset. Tonight is being Gallery Opening. I am being invited as Important Citizen of MetroArea. I am calling cab from home. Ismail is perhaps still at the store. It has been many weeks, but I am being sure that he will return from errand soon. I am calling cab from home, did I say that already? So cab is arriving, and I am giving address of 1515 W. Liberty. Mr. Cab Driver is not believing there is Gallery Opening, but I am forcefully telling him otherwisely. He is driving down to 1515 W. Liberty. On corner of Liberty and Magnolia I am seeing something amazing! I am seeing Ernesto's Tacos #2! How lucky is MetroArea being to have two Ernestos? Ernestos #1 and Ernesto's #2. Such luckiness.

I am leaving cab. I am being uncertain about amount of tip. Fare is $5.60. I am thinking in Bulgaria 40 cents would make very nice tip.

My sister Plashka once bought an eight-piece dinnerware set at Varna-Mart for 40 cents. But I am a realistic and practical gal, and I am realizing that Mr. Cab Driver may not be able to buy something nice for himself for 40 cents. So I am leaving $6.25, beacause I am feeling extravagant. He is not being as grateful as I am hoping.

So, I am entering 1515 W. Liberty. It is not looking like Gallery, more like walk-up flat with homeless people on curb. But I know that trendy hip artists like such things, so I am not being much dismayed.

But inside, oh, inside, I am finding much that is making me happy! I am finding Ana-Elena Devescu, and Miss Albania, and Elizabeth Nkwame, and Miss Slovakia, who is pounding me on the back so forcefully that I am afraid of damage. Oh, and even more happy. Miss Samoa! Oh, Miss Samoa who as her talent did famous Warrior Women of Samoa Dance of Fire and Many Feather-Shakings. So unique! So different!

And so we were all being mingling in much chatter and happiness, waiting for Gallery Opening to start. I was eating a new cheese, it is being called "Smoked Gouda". Much better than sheep cheese. Although in all fairness I must say that once Baba Anyeska is smoking a sheep cheese. One day, she is leaving sheep cheese next to her pipe, which is setting her shawl on fire, and soon sheep cheese is covered in flames and burning shawl.

My cousin, Todor, thought perhaps that Bulgarian Smoked-Shawl Sheep Cheese might be finding a foreign market. Sadly, as always, Todor was not being correct. To this day he is being bitter, and still is trying to smoke sheep cheese. This week is tablecloth. I think he is not learning.